Unhappy Marriage
Couples always ask us to teach them communication skills. Usually they are having trouble understanding where their partners are coming from. Their communication breaks down quickly when the broach a topic they disagree about. They cannot understand how they get caught in what we call “the 0-60 ramp up phenomenon”: it takes a minute to…
Read MoreHow do you know if you’re at risk of having an affair? Are there certain signposts? Do you find yourself considering the possibility? There is no single cause that leads people to infidelity. Each person has his or her own psychology and motivations. What drives one individual into a high risk situation will lead another…
Read MorePeggy came into her session looking distraught. “There must be a screw loose in my head or I’m just not that bright when it comes to men. You would think that I would learn, but no matter how hard I try to select carefully, I end up with guys who want someone to take charge…
Read MoreIn the thrall of new love’s glow you may have minimized your partner’s expectation for you to have a congenial relationship with your in-laws. In fact, you may not have fully understood that a relationship forms an alliance between two families― each of which has its own cast of quirky, idiosyncratic characters.
Read MoreMarried friends often commonly complain about the loss of sizzle and ensuing staleness and boredom that creeps into their marriage relationship. They are afraid they can’t fix their unhappy marriage relationship after the infatuation ends. Couples reminisce about how they felt when they fell in love, describing fireworks, shaking earth, clammy hands, flushed cheeks, unbearable…
Read MoreWhat’s in it for me? Tell me…
This question might strike you as the epitome of selfishness. You might just want to chalk it up to the narcissistic culture which surrounds us. What’s in it for mecertainly lacks any sense of poetry, romance or selflessness.
Is there a righteous place in modern relationships for this line of inquiry?
Your relationship is always changing in perceptible and imperceptible ways. Even the most rock solid ones are in a state of flux. Like nature, relationships have seasons and rhythms. But within each “season”, couples build stronger unions or drift apart. Your thoughts, words, attitudes and behaviors dictate the direction . You can choose to move toward more intimacy and closeness or away toward isolation and alienation.
Read MoreCan a Sexless Relationship Thrive? Richard, a 40 year old client told me recently, “I’ve been married for nine years. My wife, Diane, means everything to me. I love her dearly. She is a great partner and companion. We‘ve created a wonderful life together. I know it may be weird, but we don’t have sex.…
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