Unhappy Marriage
If a confidential survey asked, “Are you in a happy marriage?” would you have an immediate answer? What if it asked, “Are you in an unhappy marriage?” Would you be able to answer “yes” or “no” confidently…and explain your answers? Sometimes the middle ground sounds something like, “Sure, we’re happy….Well, we’re not unnnhappy….” If you’re…
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How can you fix an unhappy marriage if you don’t even feel any happiness worth fighting for? Unfortunately, most couples wait too long before getting help — an average of six years according to marriage expert John Gottman. By the time many couples find their way onto the therapist’s couch, they have already made up…
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Gratitude is a “relationship-strengthening emotion because it requires us to see how we’ve been supported and affirmed by other people.” When we perceive that others appreciate us, we value our relationship with them. Grateful couples feel more satisfied in their relationship and closer to each other. Moreover, grateful couples are more likely to stay in their relationships according to expert research.
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Couples always ask us to teach them communication skills. Usually they are having trouble understanding where their partners are coming from. Their communication breaks down quickly when the broach a topic they disagree about. They cannot understand how they get caught in what we call “the 0-60 ramp up phenomenon”: it takes a minute to…
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How do you know if you’re at risk of having an affair? Are there certain signposts? Do you find yourself considering the possibility? There is no single cause that leads people to infidelity. Each person has his or her own psychology and motivations. What drives one individual into a high risk situation will lead another…
Read MorePeggy came into her session looking distraught. “There must be a screw loose in my head or I’m just not that bright when it comes to men. You would think that I would learn, but no matter how hard I try to select carefully, I end up with guys who want someone to take charge…
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In the thrall of new love’s glow you may have minimized your partner’s expectation for you to have a congenial relationship with your in-laws. In fact, you may not have fully understood that a relationship forms an alliance between two families― each of which has its own cast of quirky, idiosyncratic characters.
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Married friends often commonly complain about the loss of sizzle and ensuing staleness and boredom that creeps into their marriage relationship. They are afraid they can’t fix their unhappy marriage relationship after the infatuation ends. Couples reminisce about how they felt when they fell in love, describing fireworks, shaking earth, clammy hands, flushed cheeks, unbearable…
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