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Sex. It can be a hot and heavy wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am, or even a distant memory. But one thing sex is not is “talked about.” At least not easily or frequently enough. And yet, when couples improve communication about sex in marriage and long-term relationships, satisfaction skyrockets in the bedroom. Your overall relationship also improves along with your sex life.…
Continue ReadingNegative emotions don’t exactly exude a welcome invitation to higher learning. They feel crappy, they challenge your very thinking and allotment of energy, and they drain the life force out of you. One of the most negative emotions is jealousy. Within your relationship, it can be destructive. Within yourself, it can be devouring. This is…
Continue ReadingThe irony of surviving infidelity is that you have to do now what you should have done then. But now you have to do it consciously, conscientiously, and consistently. And you have to do it under the assault of anger, pain, guilt, shame, regret, fear, sadness, and emotional fatigue. Communication now has make-or-break importance. Talking…
Continue ReadingYou’re not asking for anything unreasonable when you expect commitment and trust from your partner. And jealousy is a natural reaction, though it can get out of hand. You just want what belongs to you. And you don’t want anyone else threatening to take the one you love. But it’s important that you understand how…
Continue ReadingBetween rom-coms and fairy tales, you may have grown up starry-eyed and heart-thumping with the idea of spending happily-ever-after with The One. No harm, no foul. After all, if people didn’t yearn for connection and commitment, our species would need a miracle to continue. And thank goodness those hormones that drive lust, attraction, and attachment…
Continue ReadingRelationships, as we all know, are complex, complicated, and often teeming with hidden messages about where we’ve been and where we need to go. We “work through our stuff” in the context of relationship, whether we recognize the process or not. If we’re paying attention, we see the signs that can help us navigate our…
Continue ReadingIt’s an unfortunate place to reach in a marriage. Taking a lifetime vow and then feeling disconnected from it can be a lonely, confusing, even frightening reality. Simply questioning, “Is my marriage worth saving?” speaks to the fragility and potential demise of the union. There are ways, however, to slow down the frantic questioning and…
Continue ReadingOf all the tell-tale signs that a marriage may be in trouble, contempt is the worst. There are plenty of reasons contempt is considered the greatest predictor of divorce. And if you have reached this stage in your marriage, you may not see any way out. But if you can commit to learning how to…
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