Posts
Therapists are trained to read between the lines, to watch and listen for signs that something painful may be lurking beneath the surface. So, when someone asks, “How does an unhappy marriage affect you?” we ask more questions than we answer. No matter what your marriage looks like, you know that you and your partner…
Continue ReadingEverything about relationships seems to come back to communication. There’s the verbal, the non-verbal, the implied, the assumed, the implicit. And, if you’re not paying attention, there are the proverbial ships that pass in the night. Learning how to communicate more with your spouse is the most important effort you can make to keep your…
Continue ReadingBy the time a married couple considers therapy, the spouses are usually trying to save or repair their marriage. Couples therapy is often the first outreach, in part because its format is familiar to most people. One hour a week for several months (maybe years), a comfortable office with couches and chairs, a therapist with…
Continue ReadingMarriage challenges us to learn about the ways our most reflexive communicative patterns and habits might be getting in the way of relationship harmony. And nothing is more consistently challenging than communicating responsibly in the face of intense emotions. If you are married, the stakes are high for you to learn how to communicate with…
Continue ReadingFrom bliss to boredom, from soaring hopes and dreams to wondering why you ever got married. You may be asking, “Why stay in an unhappy marriage instead of getting divorced?” You may even have one foot out the door. Plenty of couples stay in marriages that look miserable from both the inside and the outside.…
Continue ReadingYou talk about work. You talk about the kids. You talk about rush-hour traffic. But you don’t know how to get your spouse to communicate with you about things that make you a couple. You live in the same home, sleep in the same bed, share the same anniversary. And yet, your communication has lost…
Continue ReadingIf you have had an affair, you may still be in a conundrum of guilt, shame, and indecisiveness. Surviving infidelity as the cheater rarely elicits empathy or help from his/her circle of influence. That outreach is usually reserved for the betrayed. It’s difficult to get an accurate count of just how many people cheat on…
Continue ReadingYes, it’s possible to feel unhappy in your marriage without even knowing what constitutes an unhappy marriage. Unless you’re living in extreme misery, living in an unhappy marriage can be like slowly putting on weight, one Twinkie at a time. Before you know it, you’re taking an inspecting look in the mirror, dusting off your…
Continue Reading